To the depths...

...and the law firm which pushed me there.

I took a job in March, not a solicitor role, but a job which I thought would be a good way of getting me used to conventional private practice after being out for a while. Also it was a City firm, not at the top, but well known enough to potentially mean something on my now rather dishevelled looking CV, so it would be good experience generally.

It meant a slight pay cut, but when I worked out my contracted hours/pay, what I'd gain in travel and free time, and the fact that my practising certificate and CPD (including SRA management stage 1 course) would be looked after while I was there, I thought made the job a good stop gap whilst I continued to look for work elsewhere. There was also in the depths of my mind the potential could be there for a NQ position.

I remember the interview. I knew I would get the job, why wouldn't I? I was over qualified for it. I remember being asked about how I'd deal with being over burdened with work, and recall responding how I was not afraid of hard work, but also that I also knew what reasonable looked like, so I wouldn't be taken advantage of. So then came contract negotiations. On a one year fixed term contract they tried to get me to sign up to a three month notice period. Whittled it down to what I thought was a good compromise at one month. I asked about overtime and was told that it wasn't paid, but also that it wasn't usual for there to be a requirement to work long hours in the department. Great. I need a work life balance, I've got a proper job to look for.

So I start my job. Its not too long in when I realise that I am doing the same job as a solicitor at a considerably lower pay, and the volume of work I had been given required me to work considerably longer hours than I had been expecting. But I enjoyed the responsibility. I enjoyed the work. And I enjoyed the fact that I was performing, in the most difficult of situations (poorly organised contract, lack of direction, support and training, and over allocation of work to name a couple). I was achieving.

"I know what reasonable looks like" ran around my head, and I took a step back to recognise that a 50+ hour week did not resemble reasonable.

So I contact HR. I say that I suspect she wasn't aware of how busy the department was when negotiating my contract, and filled her in. Could something be done? She'll talk to the department head the following day. A week passed. I didn't want to be a pest. Two passed and I got restless. I got in touch and she was on holiday, she'll sort it out when she gets back. Basically I got the run around for 6 weeks before it was "addressed". And only after I realised that I'd been fobbed off for all of that time, was it that I realised that I was getting used to being in to work at 7am and leaving after 7, 8, 9, 10pm each night. What happened to my job hunt?

I contact HR again, and the following day, department head pops by and informs me that the last thing he wanted was an unmotivated workforce, who felt unappreciated. These are words which I'd never uttered. He knew his department morale was at an all time low. We'd talk.

My supervisor contacts me, and informs me that an in principal increase has been agreed for an additional role I had agreed to carry out, but nothing formal had been done. So cash for the additional role, but what about all of the additional hours? I write to my supervisor, and the department head suggests I arrange a meeting with him. Of course, he goes away for two weeks and by this time four months has passed.

Its d-day and I'm called in to the den. I wasn't feeling nervous, and was quite optimistic that someone who had reached such heights and appeared so understanding when we had first spoken, was a reasonable person and understood what made people tick.

So tell me @little_lawyer, where do you live? What do your parents do? Why did they come to the UK? What university did you go to?

I had clearly read this all wrong...

He expected all of his team to work hard, so the additional hours worked were neither here nor there, and anyway, its about the quality and quantity of output not how long it takes to do something. I had a few weeks previously received a dazzling review...I suggested that if I wasn't working at the required competency level, it was a bit late to start suggesting I was not performing.

I was not "visible" in the team and every time he saw me I was sat at my desk working. What. The. Fruck. He must have skimmed the bit about my work load. Also, I had a great relationship with qualified and non qualified colleagues (they're a good bunch), he was never in, what did he know!

He couldn't see how I "added value" to the team. Obviously he missed the emails and training sessions I had organised for his qualified and non qualified team without which the department was flailing under the pressure of workload and lack of training.

And anyway, and more importantly, he had the cash to pay me more if he wanted to, but what made me think I was worth more when he had the cream of the crop from Cambridge and Oxford working for him?

I assumed my usual (and recognisable) position at my desk.

That was two months ago. Ever since, my constant IJ sounds, "I'm going to resign today" but all of my friends and family keep telling me that I'm better in a job than out, and the news keeps telling me the recession is deepening so I should be grateful to have this job. There have been sleepless nights. My heart is constantly palpitating. For a time I was in excruciating pain in my back and face due to tension. And more importantly, I think its time to take the work "resilient" from my CV. In that brief 15 minutes, every stereotype about city law was confirmed, and almost every ounce of self belief and esteem had been verbally beaten out of me.

Optimistic. Scrub that.
Realistic. I know my place and others are only too pleased to keep me in it. I've not yet worked with anyone I have thought impressive and would wish to emulate but background counts.
Candid. It has taken me nearly two months to pluck up the courage to write this. I'm embarrassed by my career. I believed that hard work and half a brain would get me the career I thought I deserved. I am battered and bruised, beaten and defeated.

Welcome to the weekend...I'm not a racist!

So I leave work early after just hearing that I will be overloaded with cases next week. I'm not worried and I'm sure it wasn't intentional, so I fired off a quick email to suggest that the allocation needed revisited and ran out of the door. I had to get to Snappy Snaps to collect my passport photographs before they shut.

Feeling breezy, knowing I'll definitely make my train, I take a seat in a section where no one was sitting. Put my bag beside me, but within minutes a woman comes along and asks me to move it. Not unreasonable even though there's plenty of space elsewhere, but I'm reading tonight's Evening Standard, so felt I needed room to put my bag somewhere. I move to a section where there is more room and take my seat.

Train leaves....train arrives at intermediate station...

Three girls jump on, and take the two free seats in my section, one sitting next to me with her friend on her lap the other opposite me. She's leaning on me, and although I know better than to expect my personal space not to be invaded on public transport, its unreasonable to expect me to make the remainder of my journey as a cushion for a stranger.

"Would you mind not leaning on me please?"

I'm not sure how else I could have asked, but I obviously asked in the wrong way. The abuse begins...first laughing in my face for asking because that's rude, then I'm cheeky for saying anything at all, at my age I should have known better than to be so rude..., I should have shut up...I quite happily would have but they were relentless.

I kept my composure and suggested that they should take a look at their own conduct, and I asked if there was any way I could have asked which wouldn't have annoyed them. It just made them worse.

Oh dear.

I should watch myself because, "you don't know what I'm capable of" and they begin to become aggressive. They continued to suggest that I should shut up, then talked amongst themselves laughing about it, and saying how they loved it when they made old people shut up and how great it was. All this, because of course, I should be intimidated by these three young girls who decided to make my journey home, and start to the weekend a memorable one.

Mr Knightinshiningarmour sat opposite me and piped up suggesting that one of them takes the free seat in the other section - more ammunition and they started on him too. Asking if we were together, suggesting that if they were adults he wouldn't have got involved, so I pointed out that there are 3 of them attacking me, and what made them think it was acceptable to behave in such a way anyway? I think I actually said they should have more respect for their elders because they kept going on about how old I was.

Oh cringe.

I realised that these girls would not stop talking, insinuating, commenting, and laughing at me, so I decided that I'd said enough and it wasn't worth it. Nose in book, I let them talk amongst themselves, and apologised to Mr Knightinshiningarmour who tried to help which only seemed to give them ammunition to make lewd comments about the two of us.

Finally my stop. I get off, passed them (thank goodness without a hiccup) and queued to get off the train.

"No wonder she needed all that room, look how wide she is!"

If these girls thought they were so good, why did they wait for me to leave before make personal comments about how I looked. I turned back, walked up to them, and suggested they should have said those things to my face rather than to wait for me to get off. Oh the shouting as I walked away. The little cows didn't get off and face me directly though...

I wouldn't have mentioned their race, but I got off a train, and Mrs Elderlyblacklady came up to me.

"Please don't judge them all, they're not all like that"

She continued by telling me how her younger sister used to be like those girls but how she's different now. These were three black girls and I judged those girls on their behaviour. A shame that they did fit a stereotype which Mrs Elderlyblacklady was clearly well aware of. She felt embarrassed for young black girls generally, and I felt embarrassed that she felt that way. And of course sorry that Mr Knightinshiningarmour had to continue his journey with them.

It did cross my mind on my walk home however, whether if they were 3 white girls, 3 polish girls, 3 asian girls, 3 indian girls or any mix of those races the same thing would have happened. Maybe in certain areas of town, or in certain cliques...

A question of sport...read on, it gets sexy...

Who'd have thought sports pages could be so interesting!

Through no fault of her own, rather than get on and do the job she trained to do, the now well known Sian Massey is at the centre of a high profile scandal, following inappropriate (and undeserved) comments regarding her ability to referee football matches, because according to the "experts", its a man's job.

Massey was to assist the referee in this week's Crewe v Bradford game, but was "withdrawn" from her duties. This weekend she was to work, but has been withdrawn from duties once again, because it would be "unfair on the clubs".

There has been a backlash against the dismissal of Andy Gray and subsequent resignation of Richard Keys, but lets face it, Sky didn't really have a choice if it did not deal with the issue once it was made public unless it wanted to be accused of third party harassment. According to some of our fine nation's best loved celebrities, this kind of banter is normal, and restricting people so that they couldn't have a laugh and a joke in such a way would ruin the fun.

Bruce Forsyth is quoted in the Daily Mail as saying, ‘We all say things. We’re all cursing and saying sexist things. When you’re off camera, you do say these things for a bit of a laugh. But it’s just to relax.’ Charlotte Jackson looks extremely relaxed here.

But there's a bigger picture and more at stake here. This isn't a story about sexism in the work place, restricting freedom of speech or political correctness gone mad. Its by far wider reaching than all of that. This is about diversity in the work place. The number of female sports presenters/the number of female stockbrokers or bankers/the number of female judges/the number of female chief executives...do you see where I'm going? There are obvious barriers to entry for anyone wishing to penetrate a profession which is dominated by people of a particular sex or race. Those who chose to try, chose also to accept and tolerate the kind of banter that is ultimately demeaning, or face career suicide if they speak up. Maybe worse, those who move on to alternative careers or those who have the potential but don't even try.

Sian Massey is inadvertently being punished for being a woman. She didn't make the complaint, or release the footage, but she has been prohibited from doing her job, leaving it to her male (and no less qualified) colleagues instead. I suspect that if you're a Gray supporter, you probably think there's a career for her as a pin up. If you're on Team Massey, maybe a career as a sports presenter (with a sideline in teaching us all the off side rule) beckons. At the very least I hope a lucrative and long career awaits, because at the moment, it is clear that her chosen career has been stalled.

Introducing...

The old me...

So I beat the gavel to find myself without permanent work as a solicitor (and after 9 years to qualification!) This blog is about the trials and tribulations of a lawyer who doesn't lawyer much...and other things that interest her... Find me on www.twitter.com/Little_Lawyer

The reality has been quite the contrary. I have lawyered lots since qualifying. I worked for 3 months as an employment lawyer (and loved every moment), until recently, I was a regular solicitor for a local Advice Centre working on a pro bono basis, and in my current job, my skills, my attention to detail, my personal attributes, and my legal knowledge have meant that I have been an invaluable part of a successful team.

So whats the point of this post? It is to introduce myself proper. No longer will you hear about how inexperienced I am and how I don't know what I'm good for or where I'm going. Granted, that's still the truth, but ultimately those interested know how long I've been qualified for, and I know I'm a bloody good at anything I've turned my hand to so far, having never been on a losing side. Yes, that's right, I'm a winner. "Fighting talk" I hear you say. I've no reason to lie.

So let me introduce myself:

Optimistic, realistic, candid.
You'll find here a personal perspective. Even so, you'll come to appreciate that I'm around.
Trust me, I'm a lawyer.

Find me on www.twitter.com/Little_Lawyer

Welcome...to my world...

And so, the end is near...

You guys may have guessed (I know my handful of readers are incredibly perceptive) that I'm no longer unemployed. You may also have guessed that I'm not contributing all that often to this blog. A couple of reasons.

My blurb *up there* is still kind of true. I'm not in permanent employment, and I am an out of work lawyer but I do work full time hours and in legal London in a law related capacity.

I have now (by my super scientific calculations) been in work more than out. This in itself is a reason to celebrate. I hope to have work for a fair few more months and I'm fairly relaxed about that. The job search has gone on a bit of a back burner...I will pick it up again, as I don't want to get comfortable in my new role. Plus there's lawyering that I want to be doing, what I'm doing now, will make me lazy/crazy...

Also, following last week's inadvertent "announcement" its probably not wise for me to continue this blog at all. I may find myself needing this outlet and going for it, but I think it unlikely now that I may have lost my anonymity. Its been fun, but while I'm buying my travel season ticket, and saving Asda from eccentric men wanting to sue them for confiscating towels as part of my pro bono work (all very important stuff), I will keep you all (all 3 of you) from having to check in with what I've been up to...that is unless you want some help going to sleep...

Thanks for the memories chaps.

Front page of the Law Gazette

I couldn't believe it, an article about my training firm! Well maybe that's taking it too far, but nothing I read in the article was news to me:

...some newly qualified lawyers are being told that they will only be taken on as paralegals, while law graduates seeking training contracts are being expected to work without pay.

I'm still relatively anonymous so I'll share.

While I was still there, a girl who had just finished her LPC was taken on for some "work experience". Not sure about anyone else, but when I did work experience, I did some research, copied documents, shadowed, and clerked at court. It would last from 3 days to 3 weeks. Training firm had Stunningalmostparalegal seeing clients on her own and gave her her own case load. And you know what? She wasn't paid for it. The arrangement was only going to last a short while, same as any usual "work experience" arrangement, but by around four months in, she is called in to see the top dog, and told that it wasn't fair that she'd been working so hard for free, and they'd pay her expenses. How generous. She never even had holidays.

Two months later, she was told that the arrangement couldn't go on as it was so for her own good, they'd have to let her go. Wonderful.

Stunningalmostparalegal was a clever girl, otherwise she wouldn't have been allowed to see clients. She gave it her all and worked hard. Luckily she is from a wealthy family, and doesn't have to worry about money otherwise there would be no way that kind of "arrangement" could continue. In effect she was used as a temp until they found another solicitor to work in the department. Yep, that's right, she was replaced by a solicitor.

Its easy to say that its just one of those things students, trainees, and NQs have to do to get ahead and there is no doubt that she had the best work experience she could have asked for. The issue here is that it is taking advantage. If there was enough work available for her to have her own case load (it was that busy), there was money being made and Stunningalmsotparalegal should have been paid.

Not all trainees and paralegals work for Linklaters, and the pay is often dire. In London the Law Society minimum is £18590pa, and outside it is £16,650 pa - there is even an option for the minimum to be waived. These trainees work just as hard as those earning triple that, and maybe harder, knowing the difficulties they will face on qualification.

The trainee I was up against for the NQ position was taken on on a trainee wage which is only just above the Law Society minimum. Was her charge out rate altered in tune with it?

No.

Should this kind of "opportunity" be seen as a right of passage? I don't think it should.

The other problem is that this "cheap" or "free" labour, makes it so much harder for us to find paid work at a reasonable wage. Why would a firm pay someone good money when they could have the work done for next to nothing?

Not sure where I'm going with this. I guess it was just to tell you all... that this shit happens.

"The market" excuse

You've probably guessed that I'm currently working. And guessed that its not permanent. And know that on the whole, I'm feeling a new kind of optimism which is creating a bubble of interest and demand around me. There is nothing firm in the pipe line, nothing set in stone, not even a firm offer out there yet, but there is movement and I'm slightly bothered. How strategically should I be contemplating these options, and can I afford to think strategically at all?

I have a friend who is in assurance and recently resigned from a position at JP Morgan. She is on the job hunt, and was telling me about how each job should be chosen on the basis that it enhances one's CV. You only move up; or sideways if it is something extremely relevant to your professional/career development.

So what do I do. I know where I would ideally like to be. The potential for it to happen in the next 3 months is there and that is fantastic. However I also know what its like to be unemployed and quite frankly, 3 months on the dole again? No thanks. Not again.

I now find myself in the midst of something extremely interesting which is in no way related to my long term goals (as I currently see them); and it wont make me rich (remember my last post?) Its not even a lawyer role, but it would be a good experience generally. But then what? What happens when I come out at the other end and am back on my tour of law firms cap in hand asking them to take me seriously once again? Will they understand? Will they take into consideration "the market"? "The market" line is getting boring, how long do we think we have left on its shelf life?

And here I am again...balls all up in the air and hoping that this girl can catch...